ASRIEL-God My Help: My second natural birth story

The experience of my second birth was completely different from what I had anticipated. Many people reassured me that it would be quicker and easier compared to my first. While it was indeed quicker, it proved to be far from easier. I discovered the importance of not having any preconceived expectations about labor and delivery. It became evident that every birth is truly unique, just as they say.

Early Labor

My son, Leo Stephen-Asriel Scott, was born on October 28th, 2023, two days after his due date. On the evening of October 27th, I was anxious about the timing of his birth, so I took moments throughout the day to pray for peace and the ability to trust God’s timing. At around 7:30 PM, I started having mild contractions that made me feel like I needed to walk around. So my husband and I went for a walk up our long, winding driveway. It was dark outside but not too cold.. We had fun joking and teasing each other about being scared of the dark as we walked all the way up to our mailbox twice. When we reached the top of the driveway after the second time around, I felt fluid leaking in my pants. It felt strange because I didn’t have the urge to pee, nor had I laughed or sneezed at that moment. I remembered something from the Mama Natural online birth course that said water breaking can feel like a slow, constant trickling. I went inside to use the restroom to see if I needed to pee, but not much came out. I changed my underwear and pants because they were intolerably wet. While doing that, more fluid came out! This slow trickle of fluid continued for about 30 minutes, so I decided to call the midwife.

Due to my recent discovery that I was Group B Strep positive, the midwife advised me to come in for antibiotics before giving birth. Wanting to give my body time to start contractions, we decided to head towards the birth center around midnight. I informed my family of the plan, and in response, my mom helped tidy up the house and gather everything I needed for the car ride. My sister and her husband kindly took my daughter to their home. At 10:30 PM, CJ and I decided to relax. We took a shower and then settled into bed in our labor room, listening to the playlist that I created for this special time. Although I had prepared the room for labor like my previous experience, I realized that I would only spend a couple of hours there before heading to the birth center in Atlanta.

After resting for an hour, we woke up at midnight and made our way to the Atlanta Birth Center. In the triage room, I decided to test my disposable underwear to confirm if the fluid leaking from me was amniotic fluid. The results came back positive. Although I was experiencing uncomfortable contractions at that point, I could manage them by breathing through and talking in between. However, I preferred not to move during the contractions. After confirming the amniotic fluid and starting the IV antibiotics, the midwife informed me that I could either go back home or stay at the Atlanta Birth Center for a two-hour observation period to see if my contractions would intensify and enter active labor. Considering the long distance to our home, I opted to stay at the birth center. At the end of the observation period, I requested a cervical exam to determine my dilation progress and decide whether I should return home or stay at the center. It turned out that I was 4 centimeters dilated, and the midwife was confident that labor would progress quickly since it was my second child, advising me to stay.

Active Labor

We settled comfortably into the Earth Room, which was adorned with wooden furniture, wall murals of trees, and illuminated by twinkling garlands. The familiar atmosphere reminded me of our own home, which is why I chose this room. Initially, I experienced mild to moderate contractions while lying in bed. Although they were not too intense, I wanted to keep things progressing, so I decided to get up and walk around. At times, I found myself on the toilet, having occasional bowel movements, which reassured me that things were indeed moving forward, despite the relatively manageable contractions. Furthermore, I decided to try the shower out of curiosity, rather than necessity. However, once I stepped in, I immediately understood why many people prefer laboring in the shower. The warm, flowing water provided a comforting sensation as I breathed through each contraction. I used the shower briefly but then got in and out once more before asking the midwife to check my progress during shift change. To my delight, I was already 8 centimeters dilated by 7:00 in the morning, and I was feeling optimistic about the possibility of things moving even faster from that point onward.

Around this time, my doula arrived after a long night with another woman who was giving birth. The dayshift midwife, Anna, suggested I get in the labor pool, as she believed I would soon enter the transition phase. However, I hesitated because my contractions were still manageable, and I didn't want to slow down the labor process. Eventually, a particularly strong contraction convinced me to enter the pool. Once inside the pool, I found a comfortable rhythm as my contractions remained intense. During each contraction, I would assume a kneeling side lunge position and sway back and forth while my husband poured water over my back - it was incredibly soothing. Between contractions, I would rest in a forward-leaning position on the pool's side, where my doula would provide a warm towel for my shoulders and I could close my eyes and relax. During this time, my contractions occurred every 3 to 5 minutes. Despite feeling dilated and pressure in my pelvic floor, I didn't feel the uncontrollable pushing sensation (also known as the fetal ejection reflex) that I anticipated. Consequently, I requested the midwife to check my progress again. It was then that she discovered I had an anterior lip on my cervix, and informed me that I was approximately 90% effaced. She suggested trying more upright positions, such as standing and bending over. Taking her advice, I left the pool and experimented with these positions. Unfortunately, the intensity of my contractions increased significantly. Seeking relief, I returned to the shower, as I knew I wouldn't be able to tolerate the nauseating contractions otherwise.

The Transition Phase

While in the shower for the third time, I reached a point where I was mentally exhausted. When the midwives came to check on me, I expressed the need for more encouragement. Although they assured me I was progressing, I expressed that each time they left the room, l felt alone and worried that I wasn’t progressing much. My midwife took my concerns to heart and thanked me for speaking up. She told me it was hard to tell that I was struggling to tolerate the contractions because I appeared relatively calm. After this conversation, neither my midwife, the nurse nor the birthing assistant left my side. I verbalized my struggle to tolerate the contractions, so my midwife suggested I get back in the pool after checking if the anterior lip had resolved, which it hadn't. Despite that, I got in the pool. During the first contraction after returning to the pool, my doula, husband, and I followed our usual routine of rocking back and forth, with CJ pouring water over my back and wrapping a warm towel around my shoulders. The following contraction triggered the fetal ejection reflex that I had been waiting for, and I could feel my body pushing the baby down towards the opening of my vagina. I told the midwife through a painful moan, “I’m pushing! Or at least my body is anyway!”

Delivery

I was truly startled by what happened next. I made the mistake of thinking that delivering the baby would be easier this time around since it was my second child. However, I was wrong. As I felt the head of my son crown, a sensation known as the "ring of fire," it turned out to be the most intense sensation I had ever experienced, and I felt a wave of terror. I literally cried out for help, expressing my lack of confidence in my ability to handle it. I feared passing out or losing consciousness before being able to catch my breath during the next contraction. My entire body felt tingly and I felt lightheaded and nauseous. Despite my doubts, my birthing team encouraged me, assuring me that I was doing great and that they were there to support me. Even though it didn't feel like it at the time, I was surrounded by help. In that moment, a Bible verse from my daughter’s Bible lesson came to mind. Deuteronomy 31:6 reminded me to be strong and courageous, and to not be afraid, for the Lord was with me. After about four pushes, my son emerged into the water at 11:58 AM, and I felt an immense sense of relief. I was grateful to God for not letting me pass out and for helping me do what felt impossible. The midwife quickly noticed the umbilical cord was wrapped around his neck and shoulders. She untangled him before giving him back to me. She suctioned the fluid from his lungs, and he let out a small whimper. My first words to him were an apology for the cord around his neck, followed by an observation that he resembled his sister. He looked so beautiful, and seeing him brought me immense relief. I got out of the pool carrying my son with the help of my husband and the nurse and made my way to the bed. The midwife decided to give my son some respiratory relief using a CPAP machine for just a few seconds. She promptly placed him back on my chest as we settled onto the bed, where he snuggled against me quiet, peaceful, and content. The nurse then promptly started an IV administration of Pitocin to prevent post-partum hemorrhage.

Recovery

CJ joined me in bed, and we lay there holding our son, simply gazing at him. Overwhelmed with emotion, I couldn't help but weep as I thanked God for being by my side and helping me through this incredible experience. I expressed my deep love for God to CJ, acknowledging that giving birth would have been impossible without Jesus. As my emotions settled, the pain I was in became more apparent. Despite the discomfort, I marveled at the sight of my son doing the “breast crawl” attempting to latch on, even with his eyes tightly shut and the added difficulty of his lip tie which we would later discover.

I was so sore that the simplest movements were a challenge. After the delivery of the placenta, which I couldn't feel, the nurse began a painfully intense fundal massage. She explained that this would need to be repeated every 15 minutes for the first hour, and I dreaded each occurrence. However, I was relieved to find that the pain gradually lessened with each subsequent massage. After examining my vaginal area, the midwife revealed that I had one minor first-degree tear and a small periclitoral laceration. I opted not to have them surgically repaired. To alleviate the discomfort, I was provided with a dosage of After Ease and ibuprofen. After we were given time to bond with our son, the midwife completed the newborn screening in the room with us ensuring that he never left our sight.

To celebrate, CJ, my mother, and I treated ourselves to a delicious meal from the popular Slim and Husky's pizza joint - the same pizza we enjoyed after our daughter Braelynn was born. By 8:00 PM, we were discharged from the Atlanta Birth Center, which surprised me considering that in just eight hours, I was already able to walk around, use the restroom, and resume my activities of daily living, albeit with some lingering soreness. As we arrived home, we were warmly welcomed by my parents, our daughter, my sister, and my brother-in-law, who were excited to meet the baby and capture some beautiful photographs with him.

Resolution

During the first few days at home, I could overhear my mom and husband reviewing the videos of my labor and delivery. The audio captured my agonizing screams, which initially made it difficult for me to gather the courage to watch. My expectations of a pain-free or easier experience than my previous delivery fueled a sense of failure when those hopes were shattered by the reality of what took place. For two days, I succumbed to the lie orchestrated by the devil that I did not have a positive birth experience. However, I am grateful to God because he revealed to me that through this second natural birth process, I experienced His sovereignty over the timing of Leo’s birth allowing for my parents to be there to support me and for my daughter to have a safe place to stay, His faithfulness and attentiveness to my prayers allowing me to have a second natural birth experience without complications., His strength which he exchanged for my weakness during the transition phase of the delivery, and His protection which prevented me from passing out or experiencing a cervical tear, and put the breath of life in my son’s lungs. This humbling experience served as a reminder for me to rely on Him in all things rather than depending on myself and my plans.

Isaiah 40:28 Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the whole earth. He never becomes faint or weary; there is no limit to his understanding.